reasons your boss doesn't like you

5 Alarming Reasons Your Boss Doesn’t Like You

“I hate work.”
“I hate my boss.”

Sound familiar? Having a toxic workplace environment, where your boss doesn’t like you could become so distracting that it can prevent you from effectively doing your job.

Before you quit your job or consider that it may be time for you to change careers, let this article be a guide to help you determine if your boss is being irrational, or if you are the one causing their dislike for you. There may a few things you can do to mend this relationship.

Here are 5 alarming reasons your boss doesn’t like you, and what to do about it:

1. Unhappy with work because your boss is intimidated by you

manager is intimidated by me

There are so many people who pass through life just getting by. They perform their duties for society, make just enough to live, and never go over the top or set too high of expectations. Life for them is…normal.

Then, you’ve got people who put their all into everything they do, and then some. These types of people are rarely satisfied with low pay, set hefty goals for themselves, and tend to come across as “try-hards”.

I don’t know about you, but I’d rather be a try-hard with a million bucks than the former.

Not to mention, when you try hard at the things you put your mind to you become a useful resource for the world. And our world needs more resources.

But what happens when you ‘try-hard’ at work, outperform everyone around you, and your boss notices and starts looking at you weird? I mean, surely, you never had plans to make it seem like you could do his job better than him, right?

Well, here’s the truth:

It doesn’t matter what you seem like, or how others perceive your intentions. people will always make assumptions about your personality and behaviors.

Sure, your boss could put more effort into her job to match your effort. But at this point, you’re now competition.

competition at work career tips eHowdy

Signs your boss is threatened by you in some way:

  • They say good morning to your co-workers but not you.
  • Never asks your opinion on matters that your role should be giving an opinion on.
  • Refuses to give you their complete, undivided attention. This is usually your manager’s attempt to avoid a personal confrontation.
  • They always use a stern, authoritative voice with you. This is especially true when it’s obvious they are doing it simply to display the power of their position.
  • Acting as if their time is more important than yours. An example of this is they never return your requests for assistance.
  • Constantly checking up on you at work to see what you are doing; meanwhile, they don’t do this to your co-workers.

Although some of these may apply to you, don’t always take it personally. It could be that you simply have an inexperienced and incompetent manager who is power hungry.

How to impress your boss and win them over

If you truly feel that your boss is intimidated by you, you should first take a deep breath. Lighten up a little. Try doing this smiling technique from our recent article.

Maybe your manager is a little self-conscious. And so, you coming into their environment and excelling may make them feel uncomfortable.

What to do when your boss doesn’t like you:

  • Offer to help your boss with a task or project.
  • Consistently show them that you are trying to be friendly and helpful. Get them to realize you are on their side, not against them. This is an important step, if not your number one priority at this point.
  • Do you talk way too much? Consider listening more, and showing that you are capable of learning.
  • Be a team player and be optimistic to work with them without showing hesitance.
  • Try greeting your boss at every chance you get. Ask them how their weekend was. Feed them pieces of your personal life when you can. Just don’t rush it. Let it happen organically.

What’s the takeaway?

My advice is, if you are unhappy at work and think your boss doesn’t like you, just lighten up a little. Keep doing your job the best you can, and try to get your boss to realize you are on their team.

2. Boss doesn’t like you because you are late often

eHowdy don't be late for work
No one likes working with someone who is always late. And do you know who hates that you’re late more than you do? You guessed it—your boss.

In fact, according to a survey referenced by Monster, nearly one in five Americans are late for work at least once per week. So if you can stop being late, you already look better than 20% of the workforce.

However, if you continue to be habitually late, you’ll end up on the bottom 20%. And do you know what happens when you’re on the bottom 20%? You’re going to be reprimanded from your boss. And you’ll end up waking up every morning screaming:

“I hate work! I hate work!”

If you keep disappointing your boss by showing up at a time later than what was agreed on when you started, eventually, you’ll be retired like an old shoe.

Here’s the thing, being late a few times is okay, even expected. Everyone has things going on in their personal life. But the truth is, business doesn’t sympathize with your personal issues.

Being late because you went to bed at 4 a.m. is not a valid excuse. The only thing that matters to the business is that you’re there on time, ready to fill your role to perform your duties.

There is nothing else that matters.

Businesses are in business to provide a product or service. And if you aren’t showing up on time, then those services can’t be offered. It’s your manager’s job to ensure the services are not hindered.

So, of course, they aren’t going to accept you being late. It’s their job to make sure you aren’t. You being late makes their job more difficult. And people dislike difficult things.

What’s the takeaway?

If you’re picking up on signs your boss doesn’t like you, reflect on how often you are late to work. Are you sleeping enough? If not, this could be a huge part of your problem. Getting 8 hours of sleep is imperative for living a healthy, successful life.

3. You’re an inefficient worker and unhappy at work

lazy worker bad work ethic

You know that song by Paul McCartney called Live and Let die?

“When you’ve got a job to do, you better do it well.”

It sounds pretty awesome behind a rhythm guitar and drums, but its tone rings truth. If you are going to do something in life, you should always put forth your best effort. Otherwise, what’s the point in doing it?

Why leave behind a legacy of broken pieces and unfinished tasks?

Not only does it hurt you to slack on your duties and not practice organizational skills, but it’s likely one of the signs your boss doesn’t like you. Why? Put yourself in their shoes.

If you were managing a team, how would you feel if you had one worker who always did less than everyone? This person never takes any initiative, they always graze over fine details, and they never clean up loose ends or take things seriously.

No one wants this type of person on their team.

boss doesn't like you and is angry

If you find that you are this person on the team who tends to let others pick up your slack, try turning a new leaf. Be the first to jump on a task, or at least second.

Whatever you do, don’t be the last one to volunteer yourself.

Managers have enough to deal with. Don’t make their job more difficult by pushing when they’re trying to pull. This is especially true when your boss doesn’t respect you. Otherwise, you’re guaranteed to end up on their rotten side, and you’ll hate your boss even more.

What to do if your boss doesn’t like you anymore:

  • Be more speedy on your replies.
  • Make yourself known to be the reliable one—the one who everyone can count on to get things done.
  • Don’t procrastinate on tasks you don’t feel like doing.
  • Never do your job well to impress others. Do it well because you are passionate about your work and it’s who you are—you thrive to succeed, and nothing less.

What’s the takeaway?

If you’re trying to figure out why your boss doesn’t like you, take a look at your work ethic. You may find that you could be putting more effort into your job.

4. Hate your boss because your personalities clash

boss doesn't like you personality eHowdy

“My boss doesn’t like me. I’m so unhappy with work.”

Having a bad relationship with your boss is comparable to having spousal issues.

In both scenarios you are risking two things if you cannot come to terms:

  1. With your boss, you risk losing your job, or never getting the promotions you want. If you plan on asking for a raise soon, check out this article for advice on how to negotiate a salary.
  2. With personal relationships—like marriage, you risk separation.

Imagine this: 10 years of being in a relationship with your loved one, and you finally realize your personalities don’t match. You are incompatible.

If by then, you haven’t already learned how to compromise in regard to each other’s flaws and weaknesses, you’re in a pretty bad spot.

The same applies when your boss doesn’t like you and you have clashing personalities.

So if you’re wondering how to get along with your boss, there can only be two circumstances that happen:

  1. You compromise so that you can work together in a non-toxic environment.
  2. Or you let your differences break you to the point of quitting your job or getting fired.

In order to learn how to accept each other’s differences in chemistry, you must first recognize that you in fact, have clashing personalities.

Check out some of these tips on getting people to like you. It may help you win your boss over.

Bad manager

Signs you and your boss have polar opposite personalities:

  • You sweat the small things or have cosmetic differences. For instance, your religions are different. Or one blesses the other when they sneeze, and the other doesn’t return it. Minor, but it’s a perspective issue.
  • Your boss requires that you complete tasks with little direction. Whereas you need much more guidance in order to do your job well.
  • Your boss wears perfect clothing every day, is bathed in perfume, and sometimes overdresses for the part. You’re the type that could wear pajamas to work if they let you.
  • You don’t enjoy being micromanaged. Your boss wants to know every little detail.

There are actually 16 types of personalities, and millions of ways to realize if someone matches yours. And while there isn’t much you can do to force chemistry, there may be a few ways you can at least get along when you’re unhappy in work.

Try doing this to get along with your boss:

  • Even if you’re not big into clothing and you know your boss is, try to compliment them. Show them that you appreciate who they are and how they present themselves.
  • If you don’t like being micromanaged, speak with your manager. Ask if there are other ways you can communicate your responsibilities to better suit the way you perform your duties best.
  • Don’t change who you are. Instead, recognize that each have their own opinions and ways of living, and accept these differences.

What’s the takeaway?

Your personality shouldn’t be shaped by how people react to you. Always be your true self—the true you who chased your childhood dreams.

Do what feels right. If you and your boss’s personalities clash, try your best to get along. Even if it means going out of your way to please them.

5. Your boss doesn’t like you because you are not manageable

overachiever at work

There are two types of people in this world:

  1. Those who like to innovate and manage things (true leadership).
  2. And those who want only to use those innovations (followers).

There is absolutely nothing wrong with being a follower. Not everyone is built to be a leader, and our world doesn’t need to be full of only leaders.

There are a few scenarios that exist amongst how these two types of people operate:

  • A leader and a follower is the optimal combination to complete a task.
  • Two followers work well together, but the process is a bit clunky without a leader.
  • Two leaders also work well together, but, by the nature of leadership, one will want to lead.

It’s when you’ve got two leaders when structural issues arise. A leader does not want to be led. Nor does a leader want anyone judging their methods. However, a great leader will accept criticism, whereas, a bad manager at work will be irritated by it.

Leaders are also excellent at identifying other leaders as a leader.

Because of this, if you are a natural leader, then it’s very easy for you to butt heads with your manager.

That’s not saying that all managers are leaders, because they certainly are not. But it makes it very easy to quickly hate your job when you work somewhere that doesn’t allow you to lead in your role.

I hate work

Leaders hate to be managed.

Do you know who despises that you hate to be managed more than you? Your boss. And it’s enough to make them want you gone.

You need to try really hard to work with your manager when you have a leadership personality. It’s okay to have a certain way you like to do things (a method to your madness). But, you need to consider that it’s your boss who is the manager, and you need to respect that.

I recently read an inspiring article by Brian Tracy, and he talked about the “Universal Maxim”. It goes like this:

“You should live your life as though your every act were to become universal law for all people.” – philosopher Immanuel Kant

If you don’t respect your boss, and this behavior was to become the norm, then when you become the boss, those who you manage would also not respect you. It’s like karma.

inspiration motivation hate your boss

How to deal with bad manager personalities

In order to get along with your manager, you need to let them guide you. It’s their turn to lead, not yours. Your time will come when you get promoted to a leadership position or start your own business.

Here’s the big secret to being managed when you’re a leader :

Allow yourself to be led while still leading in the way that YOU do things.

There are many ways to satisfy your need to lead other than managing a team.

I want you to focus hard, and make sure you give yourself freedom to do things the way that makes you feel like you’re innovating. Because that’s all a leader wants—to innovate.

What’s the takeaway?

Here are my words of encouragement: everyone is capable of being managed, but not everyone is built for it long-term. If you are in a job that completely micromanages you to the point where you are losing yourself and unable to innovate, just tolerate it for now.

But always be on the lookout for grander opportunities. Consider this phase a steppingstone.

Conclusion

In this article, five major pillars of the manager-worker relationship have been outlined. If you and your manager don’t get along well, know there are steps you can take to smooth things out.

I hope this guide will inspire you to build a stronger relationship with your boss. A relationship that lasts, so that one day, your boss can help get you promoted into your next phase of life.

Good luck, my friends. Until next time.

Here’s a quick recap of 5 Alarming reasons your boss doesn’t like you:

  1. Your manager is intimidated by you.
  2. You are late often.
  3. You’re an inefficient worker.
  4. Your personalities clash.
  5. You are not manageable.

That’s all folks! Thanks for reading.

Feel free to comment below if you liked this article on 5 alarming reasons your boss doesn’t like you. I’d love to take questions or suggestions on other content you’d like to see on eHowdy!

2 thoughts on “5 Alarming Reasons Your Boss Doesn’t Like You”

  1. Thank you for writing this interesting read. It spoke to me, especially as I analyze my own relationship with my manager.

    Beth

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